July 31, 2006

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 04:49 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 29, 2006

larf's

as kindly sent by krip. enjoy.

Quasimodo died and the bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews for the new bell ringer personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he had just about decided to call it a day. But just then, an armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bell ringer’s job.

Incredulously, the bishop blurted out, "But ...you have no arms!"

"No matter," said the man: "Observe!"

And he began striking the bells with his face, producing a beautiful melody on the carillon. The bishop listened in astonishment, convinced he had finally found a suitable replacement for Quasimodo.

But suddenly, rushing forward to strike a bell, the armless man tripped and plunged headlong out of the belfry window falling to his death in the street below. The stunned bishop rushed to his side. When he reached the street, a crowd had gathered around the fallen figure, drawn by the beautiful music they had heard only moments before.

As they silently parted to let the bishop through, one of them asked, "Bishop, who was this man?"

"I don’t know his name," the bishop sadly replied, "but his face rings a bell."

{WAIT! WAIT! Not through yet}

The following day, despite the sadness that weighed heavily on his heart due to the unfortunate death of the armless campanologist (now there’s a word-of-the-day...), the bishop continued his interviews for a new bell ringer of Notre Dame.

The first man to approach him said, "Your Excellency, I am the brother of the poor armless wretch who fell to his death from this very belfry yesterday. I pray that you honor his life by allowing me to replace him in this duty."

The bishop agreed to give the man an audition, and, as the armless man’s brother stooped to pick up a mallet to strike the first bell, he groaned, clutched at his chest, and died on the spot.

Two monks, hearing the bishop’s cries of grief at this second tragedy, rushed up the stairs to his side.

"What has happened? Who is this man?" the first monk asked breathlessly.

"I don’t know his name," sighed the distraught bishop...

“.... But he’s a dead ringer for his brother."

as enscribed by the letter b @ 01:35 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

that desperate, huh?

as some of you's devoted fan's of this weblog regular readers would have already known

about my absolute utter hatred of young wee island bint's who would do anythin to land a white bloke - here's what happened to my pair of english [half-breed] cousin's last evenin.

they are about 21 and 25 year's of age, and were at this drinking place together with me mum and aunt. in spite of their presence, a pair of young thoroughly shameless lowest of the lowest common denominator's [of ethnic chink background - wot else?] invited emselves to where they were all sat.

and chat up me cousin's. like as if both me mum and aunt were invisible. the older one made it clear that he has a long-term girlfriend back home, but they still persisted.

cunt's.

and they aren't the only ones with such impeccable manner's. i've had witnessed exact same scenario's many times before, some even ignorin the white bloke's missus who was sat right there and then.

serves to show that not only these lowest of the lowest wotsit's are effin desperate for white - or even half-white - fellas regardless of age, but provin once more that chink's of their station [ie: of peasant stock] are shockingly ill-bred/mannered.

cunt's.

and i thought thai's, filipino's, indonesians and even those from the peopRe's LepubRik are bad enough. givin all asian's irrespective of colour a bad name. not to mention, yers truly also [i appear asian no matter how much i protest about not possessin their mindset, so there].

and this coming from a bunch of wotsits who'd never fail to remind us that:
[1] they have got 5000 yonk's of "culture" behind em [yeah but who still chomp on their food noisily - ie: with their gob's wide open]
[2] they are the cosmoverse's most politest people [yeah, but towards their *own* family and extended relative's only]

cunt's.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 11:33 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 27, 2006

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 12:38 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 20, 2006

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 05:01 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 19, 2006

yet another doomb blonde

yet another cow who has to bring us blogger's who blog durin workin hour's [ahem] into disrepute.

just look at her arguments. she claimed that she didn't:
1. name her ex-workplace whatsoever
2. publicise her name whatsoever
3. blog during office hour's unless there ain't anymore work
4. some other lame feeble excuse[s]

but she did include a piccy of herself, did she not? as well as talkin about the accidental show of her "cleavage"? anyways, see the dumb blonde statement above?

nuff said.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 09:12 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 17, 2006

long overdue?

are we now witnessin the third instalment of the arab-israeli war?

don't mean to sound cruel, but if they annihilate each other *completely* this time round [instead of allowin em to justify their bruised ego's], there'd be eternal peace.

sort of.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 08:34 AM | yer blah's (2) | someone's pinged

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 08:32 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 14, 2006

the joke's on me

i've had always thought only sad loser's listen to radiohead. i went out to buy the album immediately after i first heard high and dry. many many many ::ad infinitum:: moon's ago.

but it didn't turn out to be what i expected as apart from said tune, the rest were almost similar in sound. as well as leavin one with a suicidal feelin of utter despair. hence the association with sad loser's.

and then only for fake plastic tree's to come on yahoo's revamped music launchcast's classic indie station just day's ago. boy, was i nearly moved to tear's.

thom yorke did a brilliant job with his wailings, i tell ye.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 12:45 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 05:18 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 13, 2006

what has the UK become - part ii

you give em an inch, they demand a yard.

if their kith in malaysia and the wee islet could respect the law's laid down by the respective government's, i don't see why those in the UK cannot [hang on, oh because they/their father's/grandpa's served the british administration/fought in the name of king/queen and country back then, back home in india. so the least the brit's could do now is to let em do as they please respect their cultural practices. hmm.. fair enough.]

em indian's [ok so 99.8% and not includin sikh's - they are alot less gobby] have a way with twistin and turning words to their own benefit. regardless of religious affiliation. in fact, a common refrain over ere on the wee islet is that if one runs into trouble with the law, one should engage an ethnic indian [defence] lawyer.

and the irony is, ethnic indian's and sikh's are one of a few folk that i can get along really well [except havin em as work supervisor's - as opposed to superior/manager/wotsit]. but not those from the subcontinent.

who bring their caste prejudices along with em wherever they are. and then treatin wee island indian's the way they do with the lower caste's like back home.

twats.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 08:39 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

what has the UK become - part i

Mr BLiar [the capital L ain't a typo], you now have blood on yer hand's.

that trio of banker's may be in the wrong - you know, innocent until proven guilty? but to allow a foreign government to extradite your national's without a reciprocal agreement in place is, in my opinion, tantamount to treason.

and now, your givin said foreign government enough clout to bully other sovereign nation's - for instance, the wee islet [although technically a 52nd US state and a faraway province of the Peopre's Lepubrik] - into signing similar agreement's. citing terrorism as a rather totally feeble excuse for doin so.

in short, you are a massive evil twatting cunt. the sooner you - along with that self-styled first lady letterbox gob bint and yer spawn - are ejected from no. 10 [or is it no. 11?] the better.

no, maybe someone should go put a crate of fireworks in yer cellar.

nb: i must stress that the US administration are not fully at fault ere. it's that traitor BLiar [the capital L ain't a typo] and co who signed away the right's of the UK citizens. in simpler term's, their death warrant's.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 07:52 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 12, 2006

charmed2

oh, and ere's another.

ain't the crystal colours look kinda ribena-ish? they are actually burgundy coloured, and so is the rosebud. the glowy round thingy between the smaller crystal and silver spacer is green aventurine - a semiprecious stone that resembles jade.

and much affordable also.


image is copyrighted stuff, geddit? © breanagh mctavish 2006

as enscribed by the letter b @ 06:52 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

charmed

i so lurve the mirror image. the background is actually peach, but due to the intensification of the crystal colours, it appears washed-out.

the thingy is actually an accessory for the purse, handbag, and pair of jeans. hence the subject title.

anyways, ain't the rose a gorgeous shade of red?


image is copyrighted stuff, geddit? © breanagh mctavish 2006

as enscribed by the letter b @ 06:40 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 11, 2006

oh, the nerve!

those smartarses who think that the french footballer should behave professionally regardless - can't help it but conclude that they've had never played any competitive [read: throttling's, broken bones, blood.. etc etc..] sport. whatsoever. in their pathetic lifetime.

nor were they passionate *genuine* sports fans [read: shoutin at the telly, showin the finger at the telly/at some player whilst sat at the stadium, tellin the ref to go check his eyesight... etc etc..].

a shame really, said footballer should have broken that twat's ribs.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 05:15 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

that's so typical

if the allegation of that italian footballer hurling a racist slur

at his french counterpart is true [soz, i dare not mention their name's lest ineffectual amoebic types accidentally found out about this site], both nationalities are equally guilty of racism and xenophobia.

italian's more so, although some people out there would accuse me of generalisation. in fact, they are no different from em chink's [oh, another generalisation, this] who have got this amazing ability to dirty-look at ye from top to toe; simultaneously sneering at ye AND gibberin away loudly in their tongue with two or three similarly twattish-lookin compatriot's.

and on your part, after scrutinisin em carefully, they were not exactly god's gift as they'd want us to believe. yep, especially italian's and chink's.

i was subjected to in-yer-face racist behaviour by em italian's [oh and add brummie black's, a sprinkling of paki's, gujerati's, chinatown viet's, british-born chink's, and inbred cumbrian's also - see? i wasn't just generalisin about em italian's] whilst in the UK on two separate occasions. and it happened that all the perpetrator's were female.

ere i was minding my own business, on my way on the tube from my lodgings at east putney to earl's court to transit. and i was sat beside this youngish jap [spied her writin a postcard home, that's how i knew] bird who boarded the train at east putney also. and then a trio of cluckin italian bint's came on board at one of the stops, stood right infront of us as the train was packed to the rafters.

upon seein a pair of far eastern bird's [ie yers truly and said jap bird] right there in front of em, the trio sized us both up. and decided there and then said jap bird and i were mates - based on our appearances. cue: non-stop loud clackin, dirty looks, the whole lot.

never one to avoid a potential fisticuff, i glared at em in return [whilst decipherin their ethnicity], which of course irked em more as the journey wore on. it didn't help matters when said jap bird suddenly burst into a fit of giggles whilst readin her comics, at the same time when em slag's got louder.

i looked up after turnin to look at said jap bird, and as if on cue, em slag's were starin daggers at both me and said jap bird. they cranked up the volume yet again - oh and did i detect hatred in their speech?

and when the train pulled up at earl's court, i got up before they turned towards the exit, and then i uttered with enough sarcasm, "scuzzi, grazie". and a string of, erm, verbal assault's in malay thrown in for good measure.

boy, was the shocked look on their ugly mug's priceless.

the other italian cunt who thought she could get away with murder was in Leeds, who ran the family-owned cafe. pity, as her son was rather, erm, dishy-lookin [nay, it's his soundin mancunian that made me homesick]. and a manyoooo fan to boot. but i shan't bore you's to tears with my wittering's.

anyways, i am really grateful that i have an ear for languages. although i must quickly add that my knowledge of spoken italian is limited to hello, how are ye? ta-ra and ta muchly.

nothin to shout about, innit?

as enscribed by the letter b @ 04:51 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 10, 2006

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 04:27 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 08, 2006

and in the meanwhile..

feast yer eye's on these fabtastic piccy's of supporter's from all over the place in germany.

i chanced upon the link left by the blog owner at what is surely my favouritest [sport] blog which i thought would shut down upon england's demise. but due to popular demand, said blog will continue for the next couple of week's - which is a realistic extension period as the compo ends tomorrow.

drats. the dreaded withdrawal symptoms comin right up.

double drats.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 07:23 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

but why not?

gazza for engerland gaffer? for 2014?

aye? he could teach em player's a subliminal trick or three. remember that euro96 goal against scotland? erm, anyone?

nay? they could turn out to be as daft as a brush. each and every single one of em.

let's face it, none of em over-rated "golden generation" [ptui?] is a character in their own right. much less pure geniuses.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 06:54 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 07, 2006

exactly wot i thought

i know i'm unusually a wee late with this, but all the same, i thought you's [okay, *some* of you's who, like moi, haven't got bored stiff as yet] may enjoy a giggle or three at these.

talk of which, isn't it ironic that the wanking cheat was whinin about how his team was robbed, when he did exactly same to engerland?

and funnily enough, it never crossed some amoebae's mind's [or whatever that remotely resembles one] that said wankin cheat's actions were morally wrong? i guess it's similar to tellin some ethnic chink's over ere on this wee islet that copycating is totally unethical and unacceptable, but they think otherwise.

especially the ethical bit which doesn't have an exact translation in their native tongue. much less, exists in their [somewhat limited] vocabulary.

no, it's their neuron path's that were short-circuited wired differently. that's more like it.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 04:32 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

today's toons

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July 03, 2006

today's toons

as enscribed by the letter b @ 05:33 AM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged

July 01, 2006

an england fan's lament we wuz robbed!!!

'nuff said.

now, will that trio of overpaid idiot's be starrin in a pizza hut advert then? even me gran could hit a cow's arse with a banjo.

but really, as a manyoooo fan, i have had never been impressed with that bastard who goaded the ref to send Rooney off. not least he's a minging twat.

in other words, should he not be strung up and made an example of for his treacherous, no, dirty vile behaviour?

seriously, i still ain't sure which is worse: england's dismal performance or the ref being an argie.

as enscribed by the letter b @ 08:30 PM | yer blah's (0) | someone's pinged