a mate sent me this. enjoy.
ODE TO A ROYAL WEDDING
SWEEP your cupboards, move your jugs, make way for tea towels, spoons and mugs,
I've news to make you wet your bedding, it's time for the latest royal wedding
ANOTHER union of chinless wonders to rank with all the other blunders,
so let the kingdom yell and roar, "hurrah for the whorer and his whore"
FOR 30 years our prince has wooed her (though told his wife he ne'er had screwed her)
yet now our future king can say up yours, my bird's a legal lay
SHE'S got less chance of being called Queen than Joe Pasquale or Mr Bean,
but how Camilla will beam with pride, at ceasing to be Chaz's bit on the side
SO page the barons, counts and earls, alert all parasites in pearls,
bring dukes and viscounts from all fronts, and all the other Beaufort Hunts
TELL Anne to come with her gormless patsy, let Harry pose as an evil Nazi,
alongside knights in shining armour, Geri Halliwell and the Dalai Lama
AND when the couple say "I do" watch Phil The Greek, with rage, turn blue,
Her Maj will wipe away a tear, as no one in the land doth cheer
THEN it's off on a fairytale honeymoon, where they'll hunt and fish and romp 'til June,
and all we ask is they relax, then both come back as a used Tampax