July 26, 2005

of tortoises et such

now that the UK will be expectin more *tortoises tourist's from the peopre's lepubrik of china, the followin cringeworthy behaviour will be more commonplace.

which of course doesn't do any good to folk who happen to look remotely like em - ie: moi.

.. What do you think of London, Lin Li?"

"I am very lucky dog to be here! This is American English. It means, I am very lucky lady indeed."

"How have you found the British so far?"

"Very helpful and kindly and warm-hearted. For example, yesterday, when we arrived at the hotel and were waiting for the lift, a woman, she pressed the button for me! And then when I entered the room, the lights had no power, and a man came to put them on!"

but of course, the kind lady pressed the button for you's 'cos you's might had been starin yer eyeballs out at the lift and doin nothin, you #@$%!?! cow.

btw, are ye from the deepest boondock's?

just like the horrifying encounter i had with a massive bunch of hongkies hoverin and starin their eyeball's out at the underground map - whilst at lancaster gate; lookin dazed and mumblin amongst emselves. in cantonese.

just because they have the dosh to make their way to the UK - and the fact that not everyone in the lepubrik could do so - these tortoises, soz tourist's would not only turn obnoxious; but demand road and tourist spot sign's in chink as well.

and they'd justify themselves with bollocks like (i) them bringin in the dosh (ii) significant numbers of mainland chink tourist's (iii) there are many of their **"fellow countrymen" in the UK, so it's a disgrace if their need's are not catered to.

no, their threatenin not to make returning visit's more like it.

this exact same scenario is happenin right ere on the wee isle which ashamedly, the bunch of tourism authority wanker's are carryin out. apart from their rant's that wee islander's being chink emselves [?!] don't seem to speak much chinese. PARDON?

tourism is evil, i tell ye.

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* just right before the 'o' levels english oral tests, as our teacher reminded us to enunciate words properly; she regaled us about her invigilatin a bunch of chink-schooled students who pronounced "tourists" as "tortoise".

how we all larfed, holdin our sides. incidentally enough, there is an apt chinese dialect [hokkien] word to describe said #@$%!?! cow, which translates into english as "mountain tortoise".


** they'd identify anyone remotely yellow as their own when it comes to a show of numbers.

as enscribed by the letter b @ July 26, 2005 07:54 AM | someone's pinged
yer six pences' worth s'il vous plaît:









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